Our story started in June 1997, when Sergej Ivanov gave an award to me for my homepage, which at the time was on a private server. In return I visited his page and signed his guestbook on June 28.

While viewing his guestbook a banner caught my eye, so I clicked on it and went to Dreamwolf's Kerzerho page.Although it was in german and I didn't understand very much of it, something told me that it was special and I should sign his guestbook, so I did.

After a little bit more then a week, he visited my homepage and signed my guestbook. To be exact, it was on July 8.

After visiting some of his pages, he seemed to be a really neat person, and I wanted to know more. Just on a hunch I looked him up in ICQ by his e-mail-address and what do you know, he was listed there. So on the day after he signed my guestbook I sent a request for authorization to add him to my ICQ-list. I was very nervous, that he might think, that I was just a flake and I thought that he would wonder why in the world I wanted to add him to my list.

Much to my surprise he gave me permission to add him. I wanted to chat with him, but I was very nervous and wasn't quite sure, what we would talk about.

And these were the first lines that we exchanged after he asked me for my authorization:

Atilusgi-Message 09.07.97 00:37
you're very welcome, I really do enjoy visiting your
pages. It must be a bit difficult keeping them all up.
I have 4 and that's enough for me!

Dreamwolf-Message 09.07.97 00:39
Added links to your pages to some of mine ....
Inweave, Dreamwolf, Gantenbein etc.

Atsilusgi-Message 09.07.97 00:42
thank you, I have your Kerzerho page linked on mine as
well...I shall have to add more, I didn't realize you
had that many different pages :)

Dreamwolf-Message 09.07.97 00:43
Thank you for adding some of my other pages ....
*smile*

As we were in different timezones, it was hard to be online at the same time, so we exchanged our e-mail-addresses.

After a while of sending icq-messages and e-mails, I went through my divorce and was about to loose my computer. So we exchanged our snail-mail-addresses and kept in touch by writing letters.

This went on for some time, until September 1998, when some little voice inside me told me to ask him how he felt about me, which I did. The neat thing was, it took him almost no time to answer that he loved me.....***smiles***

We knew that we wanted to meet face to face, so we scheduled a trip for me to go to Vienna, where he lives, in February 1999.

I guess I was just a little too nervous, or afraid, or WHATEVER, and I chickened out of going.....

That was hard on both of us. I thought that maybe it would be easier if he made a trip to the States first, so we scheduled a trip for June 1999......well guess what? He made the trip!!!!

I met him at Los Angeles International Airport, and then we went to my home in Anaheim.

We both flew back to Vienna in the middle of June, and that's where I am typing to you now from.

I am so comfortable here, and I love him so much, that I am considering a permanent move to Austria.

To all those skeptics out there, who think that true love can't happen on the net, we are indeed an example that it can !!!!

PS. We even got matching tattoos:

Atsilusgi's Tattoo

Dreamwolf's Tattoo

 

Tattoo's are created by HANNES!

(Atsilusgi: Vienna, July 10, 1999)

 

ON AUSTRIAN TV (Feb. 16, 2000)

 

 

Updates:

Atsilusgi went back to the States on March 11th, 2000 and broke up with me on March 27th, 2000, to be free again. I still think, that we are soulmates, but her OCD made it too hard to stay here in Vienna, though this became her home.

We are still friends, and I'm here, whenever she needs somebody to talk to.

I hope one day, she'll find all the hapiness that she deserves, and somebody, who cares for her, and doesn't put her down, like it has happend alot in her life before. She is a warmhearted and intelligent woman!!! And I feel blessed to meet her! And most of all, she needs to find a doc, who continues the work with her, that she began here in Vienna, so she get's faith in herself one day.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, March 31, 2000)

 

The fact is: we both miss each other very much, and there is still love. We talk very often on the phone (up to 3 times a week), and she is going to the library twice a week again, as she still doesn't have her own computer.

It's hard not to be together, and be able to hold her tight, when OCD gives her troubles. It will take a while, until we be together again, but it will happen. Until then we will have our phonecalls and chats. Better then nothing.

Besides the feelings for each other, she misses Vienna, because it became her home.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, May 27, 2000)

 

Atsilusgi - Happy Valentinesday ... I love you, Dreamwolf.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, Feb. 13, 2001)

 

On Nov. 17, 2001 I've been flying to the States and came back to Vienna with Atsilusgi on Nov. 25, 2001. We spend 3 wonderful months together. It has been great to do things together again, all the hugs and cuddles and holding hands .... She also had a chance to see her sweet kitty again, and meet my new cat Solomon. But her illness mad it impossible again to stay. On Feb. 22, 2002 she returned to California. And she wishes now, she wouldn't have done it. So we will have to wait and see what happens. But I'm sure, she'll return to Vienna, and stay. (She's still in the immigration progress ....)

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, Feb. 24, 2002)

 

We talked alot on the phone in the past months, exchanged letters and cards. And Atsilusgi continued to go through the immigration process, cause she wanted to come back to Vienna. Also talked about mariage. A week ago she had to go to the hospital, because of her thoughts. Last night she called and told me that she has to brake up with me, and wants to go out and date guys. Thoughts that she had before. She really doesn't sound good on the phone, so I hope, she will feel better soon, and gets out of the hospital at the end of the week.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, May 20, 2002)

 

Her thoughts change alot. Sometimes she talks about marriage, sometimes about breaking up. Today the Austrian Consolate told her, that they denied her application for an Austrian residence permit. We need to fix that within the next 2 weeks.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, August 15, 2002)

 

She is back in Vienna since Oct. 2002. Meanwhile she decided to stay, and will start learning German in about a week. She got interested in photography, and is starting a new life over here. Her thoughts still bother her, but her progress is amazing, even for her therapist.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, Jan. 1, 2003)

 

It has been September 2003, when we made the decision to marry on Nov. 21, 2003! She is doing better then ever before ... and I hope this will stay. Vienna finaly became her home. She enjoys the security here, and that is life is slower over here, that makes you more aware of your life.

(Dreamwolf: Vienna, Oct. 8, 2003)

 

Farewell at the airport LAX